The other day I was at my dentist for some of the usual stuff and the people that work there hadn't seen me in a year. Since the last visit I've lost a bunch of weight and grew my hair out. I and the wife are sans (with-out) children so things change, you could say 'All is good in da hizzeh', I just had to say that. Everyone at the office said the usual stuff, look good, nice hair yada, yada until one of the staff plainly asked why the change? I thought of the multitude of answers especially since I wrote about the trend of my generation to glom unto there 'hay-day'http://thepedalproject.blogspot.com/2010/02/teen-age-wasteland.html , and I was short of an answer that suited her. Her plain and some what accusatory statement was, "free spirit". WOW, she really knew how to go right to the heart of a guy and puncture it or his most prized possession anyway, his ego. I wanted to shout "no I'm different from those posers, I'm not holding onto those glory daze, I...I"...that moment was gone and I was left with was yet another soul search. That's kinda like star search but for all the losers to make sense of what their life was meant for after that big dream went south! Yep, I was just sitting there to wall-o in my agony of self focus and despair.
I have spent hours whilst riding my steed, the Trek, pondering this very thought until I had thought that I was somewhat an unusual case. I thought. I'm yolked to the wife most happily therefore not 'free' of obligation; I will not truss-pass on society as a rule therefore not 'free' from the law; I am a religious man therefore not 'free' from the will of my God and lastly I'm not 'free' from the natural laws that govern everyone. So what is a free spirit? Is it that most people who are themselves in the labor of raising children and working, paying bills and such mistake others who have passed the children phase, who are again seeking in ernest those things that were put aside for the betterment of the family, to be seeking youth instead? I find myself not gazing at the past but rather at the universe and beyond, not at the finite but rather the infinite and not in a mortality frame of mind.
I was always seeking the greater good in God, man and the like but that is odd for most I find. Some are like the climber who is frozen on the side of the cliff, looking down and not up; frozen so as to only see the rock that they are stuck on and not the beauty of the scenery that is as majestic as giving birth to a child. That too I wrote about in another blog early last fall. http://thepedalproject.blogspot.com/2009/10/looking-down.html
So what is a free spirit or what is it that I want to say with all this change? Who cares what I want to say with my appearance! You can't see my spirit unless you get to know me or as Heinlein said in his novel Stranger in a Strange land, you "grock' me or as the movie Avatar said 'I see you". It is definitely not an outside in change but rather an inside outflow. My spirit has finally come into submission of seeing as it is to be seen. I am free from hate and prejudice , as much as I can to this point with out leaving this body and or living away from those influences that pervert and twist us to be dark of spirit, therefore not free. So therefore, for me, freedom is seeing those as they truly are not as the TV, mags, movies and such, wants us to see each other. Yes that, to me , is a 'free spirit'.
Oh, by the way the answer to the riddle is a one legged duck.
If I pass you on the road stop at Peets, because your buying...I'll 'see you' their.
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